She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
