How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
