Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Randomize
