btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Randomize
