no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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