if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
50% drunk capacity currently
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT