can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Drake has all the answers
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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