We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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