so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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