Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
