Are we in a gay sports bar?
I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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