Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Randomize