i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize