Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Randomize
