I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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