I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize