Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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