im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Randomize