I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize
