I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
