I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
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