I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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