you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize