i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
The best revenge is premature balding
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
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