is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I have post one night stand depression
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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