I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
