Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
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