Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
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