Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
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I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
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It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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