Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
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