You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
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