don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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