I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
