I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
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