So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
