yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
lets start a swedish sibling band together
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Randomize
