I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
How naked do you want me to be?
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
