im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
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