He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Randomize