never play flip cup with pint glasses
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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