It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
