That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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