Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
dude i'm inner monologue high
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
