drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.