their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
I feel great
I just peed on a car
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
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Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
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with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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