fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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