dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize
