Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
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