Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
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