Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
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