You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
