When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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