guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize