I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
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